#2 was much better!

#2 was much better!

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

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My RE rocks my socks!



I would like to start by saying that in time from Thurs-Monday 8 different people were all up in my business. I swear, all modesty is lost with this whole baby making thing.


So yeah, from the minute I met my RE I loved that woman! Today solidified that :) We got to the RE's office (the closer one we normally go to) and after DH gave his sample the washing was really quick. They called me back to the room and the nurse that was assigned to me was really sweet and asked me how I was feeling after yesterday debacle. I told her better just some cramping but I couldn't sit for a few hours after I got home. She said MY RE (there are 6 in the practice and the one that did my IUI yesterday was one of the male doctors) would be doing my IUI today. I was happy :)


So she came in and gave me a big hug and said "So I heard you had an interesting experience yesterday", DH & I laughed.


She got started and it was very "pap-smear" like. My eyes were closed and DH was rubbing my arm when I opened them he gave me a thumbs up! The whole thing was done in about 5 minutes. No crazy tools, no needles, she did great!


LOVE HER!



SO! we're officially in the 2ww. EEK!

I'm trying very hard not to think about it because I will drive myself crazy. I'm also trying to stay positive while not getting my hopes up. This is going to be a very emotional 2 weeks.
Our insurance covers 2 more tries at this, so while I'm truly hoping it works this time after everything we went through to just get to this point I know we have a few more chances.

I'll be praying to go everyday for the next 8 days or so and then I'll know.

So please keep us in your thoughts, any good vibes that can be spared are greatly appreciated.

All IUI's should be this fun!

All IUI's should be this fun!

Sunday, October 25, 2009

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I mean that in the most sarcastic way possible, btw.

First, a brief recap on this week. Thursday was my first monitoring appt. My follicles were not ready and my E2 was still low so I had to go back Friday and Saturday for more b/w and more u/s. Friday I was able to go to the Pines office but yesterday we had to drive to Margate. Mind you, we live in Homestead. Yesterday's u/s showed my 1 follie was 22mm (they like to see over 18mm) and my E2 was 273 (they like between 200-250. So I was given the go ahead for the trigger and Alexis put that one in my gut at about 8:45pm last night. We reported for the first IUI this morning at 8am.

Now on to today.....

You ever have one of those weeks where you feel like everything is going wrong and when you think it can't get any worse some else happens and all you can do is laugh?

Yup! that was my morning.

So we get to the RE's office at 8am. DH gave his "sample" and the nurse told us that it would be about 45 minutes to and hour for the wash. By the time they called it was about 9:30am. We went in to the room and the nurse was really nice. The first thing she said was "This is where the magic happens" How romantic!
She told us the post-wash count was 60 million and then gave me a brief run through of what would be happening. She asked if I had any questions and then we started.

Thus began the "funny" part.....

They could not get the catheter in to my uterus. She tried a couple of times and it just was not working. She then went and found another nurse to try. She was a little rougher but the discomfort/pain was bearable.
Nurse #1 was trying to take my mind of what was going on by asking me when I wanted to do my P4 b/w and then asked me if this was my first insemination to which I responded yes. She replied, "Oh no! I'm so sorry we're ruining it for you"
Nurse #2 also had no luck.

They said they would call the RE and have him do it. Great!

Well the RE was doing an ET. They said he would be about 45 minutes. So we went back out to the waiting room and waited. Thankfully, the RE's office has a computer station with internet access so I was able to keep myself entertained. Mind you, the RE's office closes at 9:30 on Sundays. At this point it was already about 10:25am so the office was completely empty they had turned off some of the lights and it was just DH & I. I soooo wanted to take a nap. We got gotten up at 5:30am to make to almost 2 hour drive to the office.

Anyway, once the Dr. was done we went back in to the room.

He was really nice and tried to make me comfortable.

As it turns out, my uterus is backwards which equals a painful IUI.

I didn't see what was going on because I was laying down but I do know that they inserted the speculum, then he inserted a needle (yes, a needle in my vagina!) with an anesthetic to numb the area (so glad I didn't see this part, I would have freaked out), then put in the tenaculum

and used it to straighten the angle between the cervix and the uterus could he insert the catheter. The whole thing was really painful and took about 15 minutes. Much worse than the HSG. DH was nervous since he saw everything they were sticking in there but he was really good at trying to get me to relax.

After they were done they left us in the room so I could lay for about 15-20 minutes. At this point DH started his comedy hour. He was being super silly and loving which was great :)
Once the time was up we went home. On the way down the elevator the IVF patients that the RE was working on before be got on when we passed the lab floor. Nurses 1 & 2 were with us also and Nurse #1 was chatting with her. The wife was saying how the ET went so much better than she could have ever hoped and that sh was so excited. I was so happy for her. I didn't even know this woman and at that instant I just wanted to hug her and wish her luck! Wherever you are lady in the elevator, I wish you lots of luck and hope your embies snuggle in for the long haul!!!

So now I'm home and up from my nice long nap. I laid in the car since sitting was just not an option and I'm still in a bit of pain now which is usually made better once I lay down.I'll be back there tomorrow for IUI #2.

The RE that's doing it tomorrow did my HSG so I'm hoping he'll have an easier time.

That's all for today :) I'll have a brief update after tomorrow.

Clomid...CHECK!

Clomid...CHECK!

Monday, October 19, 2009

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So Saturday I took the last 100mg of Clomid and today is the day I take the Follistim.

I am NOT looking forward to this AT ALL.

The shot is going in the stomach below the bellybutton. Doesn't that just sound like all sorts of fun?!

Now, I know that people who do all injectables or IVF have it way worse than I do so I really shouldn't complain BUT, I just recently got over my huge fear of needles.
Don't get me wrong, I still hate them and cringe at the thought but, I have gotten MUCH better.
It's always been a huge joke in my family that I'm the biggest baby when it comes to needles. I used to give my pediatrician the worst time with shots.
I have a tendency to panic, thus causing my veins to pop when they try to take blood out. I had to be hospitalized for strep throat once and it took them 7 tries to get the IV in.

Once I started seeing the RE I needed to get it together very quickly because giving blood would soon become a new hobby.
So I've learned to deal with the giving blood. Giving myself a shot however, not so much.

The Follistim has to be given between 5-9pm. Of course DH is at work during that time so I have every intention of driving him to work so that I can go by and see him between that time frame and he can give it to me.
I can already see myself staring at the damn pen for the entire 4 hours trying to decide HOW to do it.

So, problem solved. Alexis thinks I'm crazy but oh well! He'll just have to deal! :)

Third time IS a charm!! :)

Third time IS a charm!! :)

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

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Well contrary to what I thought yesterday....the cyst is GONE! wooot!

Today's appt. went great :) Thanks to those of you that gave your well wishes. Third times a charm!

The u/s tech was happily surprised to see that my monster cyst was gone. I thought I heard wrong when she said it but, it's gone! She said she remembered how big it was and said there was no way she could miss it if it was still there.

Yippie!

So I sat down with the nurse and she went over all the meds and gave me my schedule for the remainder of the cycle.
I'll start taking Clomid tonight(CD 3).

I'll take these for 5 days and then on CD 9 I get a shot in the belly. I'm still trying to figure out how I'm going to pull it off since the goal was to have Alexis do it but he'll be at work and it needs to go in between 5-9pm.

UGH!

3 days later on 10.22 I have my first monitoring appt. to check for follicle growth. If all is well then I should do the Ovidrel that day or the following.

IUI's are set to be B2B and should take place (god willing) the last week of this month.

I'm going to try to remain hopeful while not getting my hopes high. I've been really open about my IF struggles thus far but aside from my aunt and the readers of this blog, we've decided not to tell any other family members.

I figure the less people I tell the less people I have to tell if it doesn't work.

I really can't put in to words the million different emotions I'm feeling starting this leg of the journey. I thought I had an idea but I was wrong. I'm excited, scared, terrified, anxious.... I think I need a xanax. I'm trying to attempt to prepare myself mentally for the possibility that it might not work but I'm not sure that's even possible. I will just continue to pray!

Thanks again, SO MUCH to those of you that continuously send all the good, positive vibes and have us in your thoughts and prayers. It means more than you know!

It's been a while.....

It's been a while.....

Monday, October 12, 2009

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So I've basically avoided the blog for a little while because of this stupid cysts cancelling my cycles. I've had absolutely nothing positive to say so I haven't said anything at all. So far, 2 cycles have been a no go thanks to the cyst.
Tomorrow I will go for another CD2 u/s. It's actually happening on CD3 which means if all is clear (which I'm not expecting it to be) I can start taking Clomid tomorrow.
If the cyst is still there then I have plans to discuss having a lap with the RE to remove it.
I really do not want to have to do this because, wel, I'm scared shitless.
But, the reality is, I'd rather go through that pain and a week of recovery than have to deal with the excruciating pain of the damn cyst several times a month.

This whole process is really starting to wear on me emotionally. I'm really just trying to remain positive. I know that there are sooo many women who have it MUCH worse than me but this is the situation I'm dealing with. I just pray to god that it doesn't get much worse before it gets better.

If you can spare any good vibes they'd be greatly appreciated.